Archive for February 8th, 2007

American Idol Auditions 8: Best of the Rest

Oh, thank God. It’s over.

Some vaguely Napoleon Dynamite-ish music plays through the intro, we segue to the credits (hee, Taylor Spaz…and to be honest, they didn’t exactly find the most flattering footage of Carrie Underwood, either), THIS is American Idol.

So who’s the best? Tami Gosnell looks (and kinda walks) like Edwin McCain, and her lip ring is all kinds of unfortunate, but her tough, gritty version of “Whipping Post” is tinged with enough unexpected sweetness as to make her one of the best singers I’ve seen come through these auditions. She’s passed through to Hollywood. There is a mysterious “Amy” who makes the Top 24; speculation is now that this could actually be Tami. Hmm… (ETA: It’s not her. She doesn’t even survive the first cut.)

Paul Kim (Top 24! Top 24!) is motivated by William Hung; that is, that he feels Hung has done a disservice to Asians by stereotyping them all as terrible singers. Well, yes…and no, at the same time. I’m not quite sure where I come out on these motivations. Anyway, Paul is a poolboy (Does he wear a thong? Does he have a boyfriend named Chuck? Do you get these references or do you think I’m just insane?) Anway, he sings well, far better than you’d think from listening to his MySpace, anyway, and he goes through.

Heather Rennie, Ashley Cleland, and Ebony (I missed her last name, but I couldn’t swear she actually had one) are roller-skating waitresses who enter together but audition separately. Heather, who resembles a prettier Melissa McGhee, turns in some boring Rascal Flatts. Ashley gives us “Angel,” and it’s better than Heather. She’s promptly told by Paula that sometimes, when it comes to make up, less is definitely more. (And Paula’s absolutely right; Ashley is a natural beauty, like a Jenny McCarthy without the hard egde, and there’s really no need for her to slather it on.) Ebony does justice to Whitney Houston, and looks rather uncomfortable when Simon tells her that she’s in a league of her own, compared to the other two. I’m not feeling any uniqueness from her, though. Ebony and Ashley get the golden ticket, while Heather goes back to trying not to spill milkshakes and baskets of French fries.

Lakeesha Jones, rumored Top 24 contender, is…well, she’s loud. Not a lot of nuance to her voice, but the judges must have liked her for something.

The…rest: Christa Fazzino, dressed like Jackie O meets Pirates of the Caribbean and singing just as badly…Edward Sanchez, knowing full well he can’t carry a tune, but wanting to get his chance with Paula anyway…William “Wes” Samaland wearing a marigold-yellow satin shirt that makes him doughy and girlish (and does the singing really even matter after that?)…Alexander Nazario falshittoing his way through some song I don’t recognize.

And with that, we conclude with a montage of season six auditioners. Like a little trip down memory lane. Because yes, the auditions have been going on that long.

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Career day.

Taylor Hicks will be among several artists and musicians (including Corinne Bailey Rae, Ne-Yo, Imogen Heap and Timbaland) invited to participate in Grammy Career Day, to be held at the University of Southern California today. American Idol judge Randy Jackson is also a workshop participant.


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What the kids are sayin’



"I hate them all. The judges, TPTB, the blatant manipulation, the songs, the contestants, everything. I'm a die-hard Cook fan, but for the love of god, at least try to look like you're enjoying yourself up there! Please? Syesha was awesome but she ruined it by being completely shameless and disgusting. Yes, being on American Idol is exactly like the civil rights movement, except for the part where you're fighting to make the world a better place."



"All I can say after the disgusting display tonight of favoritism towards the mediocrity that is David A. - good luck trying to market and make money off of that kid, American Idol. (Not to mention good luck dealing with his father.) All the teeny boppers may buy up his American Idol coronation single, but they will quickly forget about him before the album comes out. And I shudder to think of a David A. album - song after song of unrelenting sameness and heavy breathing. Why they are pimping him for the win is beyond me."



"This show was simply a hot buttered mess tonight. And Jason "needs to be arrested for what he did to I Shot the Sheriff. But I hope he stays. He amuses me. "